Advocating for yourself at school

Having period pain, pelvic pain or endometriosis at school can be really hard — especially when you’re expected to concentrate, sit still, or participate like nothing’s wrong.

Pain is real, and you deserve support at school.

The good news is: you don’t have to share everything about your body to get help. You can advocate for yourself in ways that feel safe and comfortable.

First: You Are Allowed to Ask for Support

You do not need:

  • a diagnosis

  • to explain your pain in detail

  • to convince anyone your pain is “bad enough”

You are allowed to ask for support because pain affects learning, and schools have a responsibility to support students’ wellbeing.

How to Advocate for Yourself (Without Oversharing)

If you’re uncomfortable talking about periods, pelvic pain or endometriosis, you can keep things simple and vague.

Phrases you can use with teachers or school staff

You can choose what feels safest for you:

  • “I have a health condition that causes pain, and I may need some flexibility.”

  • “I experience ongoing pain that can flare up suddenly.”

  • “I sometimes need to leave class or sit differently because of pain.”

  • “I’m managing a medical condition that affects my concentration at times.”

  • “I’m under medical care for a pain condition.”

You do not need to say:

  • “period”

  • “pelvic”

  • “endometriosis”

  • anything about your body parts

Asking for Practical Support at School

You can ask for specific, reasonable adjustments, such as:

  • permission to leave class if pain flares

  • access to a sick bay or quiet space so you can stretch and rest

  • flexibility with deadlines during pain flares

  • sitting near an exit

  • being allowed to use heat packs, tens machines or take medication (according to school policy)

  • reduced participation in sport or physical activities when needed

You might say:

“When my pain flares, it helps if I can step out or have flexibility with tasks.”

What to Ask Your Parents or Carers to Tell the School

If it feels easier, your parent or carer can advocate on your behalf — especially if you’re younger or feeling overwhelmed.

They do not need to share a diagnosis unless you want them to.

Helpful things for parents to say:

  • “Our child experiences a chronic pain condition that can affect attendance, concentration and comfort.”

  • “Pain flares can be unpredictable, and flexibility will help them stay engaged in learning.”

  • “This is a recognised health issue, and adjustments may be needed from time to time.”

  • “We are not asking for special treatment — just reasonable support.”

Parents can also request:

  • a wellbeing or learning support plan

  • a key contact person at school

  • clear agreements about absences, deadlines and physical education

If You’re Worried About Not Being Believed

Sadly, some students worry they’ll be dismissed or told to “push through”. If this happens:

  • You are not doing anything wrong

  • Pain that isn’t visible is still real

  • It’s okay to ask for another adult’s help (year coordinator, wellbeing staff, school nurse)

You can say:

“I’m finding this hard to manage on my own and need support.”

Remember

  • You are more than your pain

  • You don’t owe anyone personal details

  • Asking for support is a skill — and it gets easier with practice

  • You deserve to feel safe, believed and supported at school.