10 tips for parents and caregivers of teens living with persistent pelvic pain
As parents and caregivers, we all want the best for our children. When a child is living with pain, it brings changes for the whole family, and it is normal to feel uncertain or ill-equipped at times.
These ideas are drawn from many years of working with children and families, and from seeing what helps most in everyday life.
Learn about persistent pain.
Understanding how persistent pain differs from acute pain—and why different strategies are needed—can help you feel more confident and informed.Support your child to live as normally as possible.
Maintaining family routines, encouraging age-appropriate responsibilities, and staying involved in family life helps children feel capable and connected.Build a strong support team.
This may include you, your family, friends, school staff, your GP, and other health professionals, with your child at the centre of decision-making.Gently shift the focus away from pain.
Pain can be acknowledged without becoming the centre of everything. Encourage helpful pain-management strategies such as favourite activities, humour, music, art, movement, mindfulness, or relaxation.Notice the emotional impact of persistent pain.
Anxiety, low mood, anger, fear, and unhelpful thoughts are common and understandable. These experiences can increase how intense pain feels. Support from a GP, psychologist, or counsellor can be very helpful.Encourage regular school attendance where possible.
Staying connected with school and peers supports long-term wellbeing. Working with teachers to develop a pain-management plan may help, including rest breaks, modified activities, medication support, or flexible learning when needed.Avoid relying on medication alone.
Persistent pain usually responds best to a combination of approaches. Medications can help some children but often have limits or side effects, and not all are approved for use in children.Discourage long periods of rest during the day.
While rest may reduce pain temporarily, too much can disrupt sleep, reduce energy, and increase pain over time. Gentle activity supports better recovery.Encourage active pain-management strategies.
Support your child to continue activities they value, including gentle exercise. A physiotherapist or exercise physiologist can help design a gradual, individualised program.Plan ahead for difficult pain days.
Having a plan can reduce worry and help your child feel more in control during flare-ups. This plan can be developed with their healthcare team.
How pain pathways work
Our brains receive information from the body constantly. Much of this information is filtered out so we can focus on what matters. The brain decides when something needs attention.
For example, the brain monitors how full the bladder is. Most of the time, we are unaware of this. As the bladder fills, messages increase until the brain signals the need to use the toilet. Once the bladder empties, the signals quieten again.
Different situations can change how this system works:
If there is a bladder condition or infection, more pain signals are sent, leading to frequent urgency or discomfort.
If someone feels anxious about bladder function, the brain may focus more on these signals, increasing symptoms.
The effect of long-term pain on muscles
When pain or injury occurs, muscles naturally tighten to protect the area. This is a normal response. Pelvic floor muscles behave in the same way when there is pelvic pain.
However, muscles are not designed to stay tight for long periods. Over time, ongoing tension can cause more pain, fatigue, and muscle spasms. Reduced movement or prolonged rest can make this worse. Gentle, supported movement helps muscles function more comfortably.
The effect of long-term pain on nerve pathways
Pain signals travel from the body to the brain via nerves and the spinal cord. Pain is felt when the brain recognises these signals.
With long-term pain, these pathways can become more sensitive—a process called central sensitisation. When this happens:
Mildly painful experiences can feel more painful
Previously non-painful sensations may become uncomfortable
Pain may spread to larger areas of the body
Pain may involve multiple pelvic organs
This does not mean new damage has occurred. It reflects changes in how the nervous system processes pain.
Central sensitisation can occur with many long-term pain conditions, including after injuries, infections, or surgery.
The effect of long-term pain on emotions
Thoughts and emotions influence pain. Stress, worry, fear, or tension can increase muscle tightness and nervous system sensitivity. For example, anticipating pain can lead to unconscious muscle tightening, which can then increase pain.
These responses are common and understandable—and they are not a sign of weakness.
The effect of long-term pain on wellbeing
When pain persists, multiple body systems remain in a heightened “coping” mode. Over time, this can affect sleep, energy, digestion, concentration, mood, and immune function.
Many people with chronic pain experience fatigue, poor sleep, anxiety, low mood, nausea, dizziness, or feeling unwell more often.
Managing chronic pain: what helps
Once pain becomes chronic, it is unlikely that a single treatment will remove it completely. However, many people find that pain becomes more manageable over time, and life can feel fuller again.
Current best practice for chronic pain includes:
Learning about your specific pain patterns and triggers
Working with a physiotherapist experienced in pelvic and persistent pain
Using medications for nerve sensitivity when appropriate, while limiting long-term opioid use
Staying engaged in meaningful activities and learning supportive ways to manage pain day to day.